Verbal aggressiveness is a
method in communication, when one is verbally attacking another in order
to express oneself or to win an
argument. When using verbal aggressiveness in communication, the communicator
wants to intimidate others. Most of the time one uses verbal
aggressiveness when one feels that they are being attacked. After feeling
attacked verbal agressors begin to attack others. This method of communication is
toxic, and it is not effective.
Often times when I communicate
I’m not aware, of how effectively I’m communicating. For example, there have
been times when my voice gets louder, and I’m not aware. Usually the person I’m
communicating with will point this out for me. As communicator we are not
always conscious of our tone and body
language during conversation. There have been many times when I’m upset, and
try to cover it by acting professional, and not upset. People are able to still
tell by my demeanor that I’m upset. From experience my verbal aggression has
led to many relationships ending, because people feel disrespected by the way I
communicate. Without communication a relationship is dead.
When asking my fiancé to take
the communication test with me, his answers resemble the answers that I
gave. I’m really close with my fiancé so
I feel like he knows me very well. He is able to rate me the same as I rate
myself. I have a tendency to be slightly biased with how I rate myself. My
fiancé answers to some of the questions were slightly stronger than my answer.
Since most of our relationship is rated based upon our communication , he s
able to rate me stronger than the average
person.
My personal goal is to try to
be less aggressive when I’m communicating. If I feel triggered by the conversation,
I can walk away, or communicate non-aggressively that I feel attacked. Various
times that I have become verbally aggressive have been when I personally felt
like I was being attacked. If I happened
to feel attacked I can respond by
expressing my self in a healthy manner. I know personally this works
with my fiance. When I tell him I getting angry we both agree to talk at another
time, once emotions aren’t as high.